8 tips to making your relationship work during covid-19
1. Have an honest conversation about your ecxpectationsAt first I think we were both overwhelmed with the whole situation and just kept to ourselves. After a couple of fights and extended periods of the silent treatment, we had an honest conversation with each other and laid out expectations during this unprecedented times.
2. Be kind to yourself and your partnerIn the beginning, I was extremely frustrated with joggling my full-time job and home schooling the kids. The lack of steady work also became extremely frustrating, hence I became hard on myself, for not being able to live up to my own high expectations. When I start beating myself up, the frustration usually trickles-down to my family members, hence I realized quickly that I had to let go and give myself grace. Once I was able to do that, I was also able to be kind to my husband and my kids.
3. Listen to each others concerns and make decisions togetherIt might sound easy to just listen to your partner, but trust me, it is harder than you think. After having our honest conversation, we started listening to each other. When I say listening, I mean really listening without interruptions and considering the feelings of your partner. Being silent when your partner is voicing an opinion you don’t agree with is a lot harder than you think, but it is something both my husband and I are practicing and getting better at.
4. Don’t fight in front of the kidsFunny thing is, my parents never fought in front of my siblings and I, but now that we are grown with our own kids, they argue in front of us lol. I have to admit, we have argued in front of our kids more times than I would like to admit, however being home 24/7 has improved that tremendously. Because this is such a trying-time for the kids, we are working hard to ensure that they are as comfortable as possible, hence seeing mommy and daddy happy makes them happy, so we continue to work hard at our relationship during covid-19, and to show the kids a united front, even when we don’t feel like it lol.
5. Show vulnerability and not angerLife as we know it has changed a great deal in the last few weeks, and it is ok to be angry about it, it’s called being human. But instead of being angry about what we have no control over, we have decided to show vulnerability, to each other. We are helping each other to get through this situation together, and sharing our worries and concerns and working together to create a home of gratitude and love.
6. Embrace role changesI won’t lie, I am not a patient person, and I continue to work at that. Home schooling requires an extra dose of patience, my husband has taken the lead in this area. Bo (my husband) used to be out of the house for most of the day because of work and his commute, and I use to do most of the kids stuff because of my flexible schedule. Now, that I have committed myself to making more video content on my Youtube channel which is extremely time consuming, I am in my office from 8:25am to 6:30pm, hence he has completely stepped up to the plate in terms of helping with the kids.
7. Share the house workWe have always done a great job with sharing the house work and we continue to do that. When we see the other needs help, we are more than happy to help out. In addition to us doing the house work, we also make sure the kids do their part.
8. Do things togetherWe can’t really do adventurous things together right now. Hence we have resorted to simple things, such as watching shows together. This makes a huge difference, and has helped us identify similar likes and interest once again. We used to watch a lot of the same things, but at some point our interests shifted. Now that we are home 24/7, we have become intentional with our relationship during covid-19. Finding time to sit together and watch shows together. In addition to that we have our Saturday night movie night and we try to have mommy, daddy time on the patio. Family walks are another thing we enjoy and do together and will continue to do after covid-19.
Read “My social distancing survival kit” post HERE
Are you struggling with your relationship during covid-19? If you are, let me know which of these tips may help with your comments below. Stay safe and healthy.